There wasn’t a seminal moment where a
light came on or anything like that. But to my curious mind it was such an interesting
word. When my mom refused to spell it for me, I broke out the dictionary to
find out it meant a bundle of twigs or sticks.
For the better part of the last two
decades if someone says the word faggot, I instantly think of a bundle of
sticks.
Maybe that makes me odd, but I thought
about my original interaction with the word, which in American English, has
been derisively used to label homosexuals Wednesday afternoon. Six months
before he hopes to be reelected Barack Obama indicated his support for same-sex
marriage in an interview with ABC News.
Some people found Obama’s support of
the issue truly groundbreaking. A part of me instantly considered it cowardly,
or a ploy to win voters this fall.
It is possible one’s position on an
issue evolves over time. Then again, it’s more likely that the president had a
slew of fund raisers planned in the next six weeks where important members of
the LGBT community will be courted for their dollars, influence and votes.
History always smiles on those who
favor justice and equality, even if the timing is curious. Or as Obama once
said: “The pundits, the pundits like to
slice-and-dice our country into Red States and Blue States; Red States for
Republicans, Blue States for Democrats. But I’ve got news for them, too. We
worship an "awesome God" in the Blue States, and we don’t like
federal agents poking around in our libraries in the Red States. We coach
Little League in the Blue States and yes, we’ve got some gay friends in the Red
States.”
Whatever may have been Obama’s
motivation Wednesday, the man deserves credit for taking a stand on a divisive
issue. This is the same man who introduced himself to
us by reminding America that “e pluribus unum” means “out of many, one.”
In high school I used to say “I don’t
hate gay people, I hate annoying gay people.” The point then, as it is now, is
that I could care less what someone does in their bedroom.
If you are going to be a jerk I don’t
care who you sleep with, I don’t want to be around you. Of course, it would be
hypocritical to write about tolerance, and my disdain for annoying gay people,
yet not admit to laughing at a well-time gay joke with just as much zest as I
would a laugh about anything else that straddled the fence of polite speech. But,
the point remains the same.
In 2001 I was a pudgy junior in high
school who likely would have been turned down for a date by a blow-up doll.
Girls were in no rush to hang out with me. For crying out loud I was six weeks
away from my 17th birthday when I kissed someone for the first time.
A boy in my English class once said I
looked like Steve Urkel. When I quipped I could wear a pink button-down — as I
was that day — without people questioning my sexuality he got offended. People said
I was mean for picking on him. However, I reminded everyone that I wouldn’t
have said a word if her friend hadn’t tried to be funny in the first place.
It’s the same with public displays of
affection. If two men, or two women, are walking somewhere holding hands or
kissing, I might look for a count longer just to ensure my eyes are not playing
tricks on me. But after that, I get just as disgusted as I would were a man and
woman groping each other for the entire world to see.
A half-decade after the Urkel incident
a college friend of mine tried to tell me a “friend” of hers was dating a
woman. Quickly, I interjected that I figured that “friend” was her. Before she
could even finish her sentence asking my thoughts on her sexual situation, I
reminded her that I didn’t care who she slept with since she wasn’t sleeping
with me.
Wednesday’s announcement from Obama
doesn’t change any laws. The bigger news on the gay marriage front arguably
came Tuesday night in North Carolina. Regardless of where one resides on this
steamy issue, we should all agree that discrimination or the intentional
mistreatment of anyone has no place in society.
Laughs and liveliness,
-Wb
